Wednesday May 4, 2011
Midnight
Mother is having great difficulty breathing; she doesn’t seem in any pain.
7:50 AM
Mother’s breathing has continued ragged and labored; I fear we may be near the end. I’m glad that Teri will be here at 8:00; this is harder than I thought to watch. I’ve given her meds every two hours and wondered each time if they are really getting into her body.
8:00 AM
Teri has arrived with a plan, she says mother never went anywhere without her hair done and her eyebrows on so that is our job to prepare her for her final journey. This is so true about mother; she has her funeral planned from who will be her pall bearers, preach her funeral, right down to the hummingbirds on the corners of her casket and the spray of flowers she wants on top of that casket.
I am designated official water girl by Teri; who gives me the job of rinsing out wash cloths and handing them to her as she does for her grandmother the same thing she did for her father on his final day on earth.
I watch as Teri brings more pillows to the bed, places one for herself against the wall, then climbs into the bed with her Nana, bracing mother against her chest, Teri places pillows around Mother to hold her head up and then proceeds to clean up her grandmother.
I listen, watch and rinse out wash cloths as my youngest child uses a shampoo for babies to wash mother’s hair. All the time she is washing she is telling mother that this was what she had done for her dad; who of course was bald but loved for his old bald head to shine. When Teri has washed and rinsed mothers hair to her satisfaction, she rolls mother’s hair; climbs out of bed then, together we bathe the rest of her body, change her night gown and as much of her bedding as we can. By now it is 10:30 AM; mother’s hair is still damp so Teri uses a blow dryer to finish the drying process; unrolls her hair, combs it out and styles it.
Not many people know that mother’s eyebrows were lost in a fire over sixty years ago; mother of course, could do them to perfection, but when Teri tries to put her eyebrows on she has to wipe them off and ask me if I know how to do her brows. This was one of the things mother had allowed me to do for her a few times so I get them on the right way after only a second attempt.
We cover mother up; Teri places her hands on top of the covers; then with tears in her eyes she says, “There you go, my Nana, you’re all cleaned and spruced up, ready to go scooter pooting. I love you, we all love. We all know that you’re tired and it’s okay to let go now.”
By now it is 11:45 AM; Teri’s husband Barry comes in the front door, comes to mother’s room; as he comes in her door he says, “Hello Nanny; it’s me Barry.” Mother takes one last breath and releases it. The time is 11:50 AM.
As if on some pre-arranged time schedule, the hospice nurse walks in the front door, as my oldest daughter taps on the window of mother’s room and the middle daughter comes in the back door. Mother was afraid I would be alone when she passed and this bothered her a lot. It was amazing that so many people arrived just as she drew her last breath.
May 4, 2011 at 11:50 AM breathed her last earthly breath. Died of cancer, Stanton, Powell County, KY
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